Archive for the ‘Mamma Mia!’ Category

Thank God she’s back to normal

Eh I think I mean that, lol.

Yesterday Maddie spent the whole day screaming her head off for the oddest reason. Miss Maddie has the longest eyelashes EVER. Well, because she had allergy issues yesterday she kept rubbing her eyes. Her eyes were irritated and her lashes kept going in her eyes making her scream bloody murder. NOT PRETTY!

This morning she is much better. No allergy issues but she seems sleepy already, and she’s still an hour and a half away from nap time. But the eye issue totally freaked me out yesterday I am sooo glad we don’t have that problem today!

Another issue with my sweet Maddie is the climbing thing. This is new to me. Mackenzie was a pleaser. By that I mean she knew climbing on things made Mommy (and Nanny-we lived with my mom) very nervous so she just didn’t do it often. Maddie, hell no. That kid does what she wants when she wants and she usually scares me stupid. I need to color my hair from all of the gray hairs she has given me in the past month. Well, she is still cimbing and standing on stuff that scares me to death but now all of the sudden she is afraid to climb down. So, over and over she climbs in things and cries and screams until I get her down. {Tried to do the cry it out, she’ll figure it out method, yeah doesn’t work-she’ll scream for over an hour}

So that’s fun!



Nothing major, just pouting.

With our income taxes I was really hoping for a new camera and some new clothes and shoes for me. Considering how pathetic my clothes and shoes are (which I am too embarrassed to admit on the internet) I was just really looking forward to it.

Of course bills come first.

It’s just that everyone always comes first. The girls, Howard…which I don’t mind but to have a few items of clothing without holes or stains would be super. I always put my family first and that will never change. Just the possibility of having some things for me got me very excited and now I am totally bummed out.

Will work for pancakes

I HAVE pulled myself out of that funk and it feels so good. I think I needed to get out my feelings so I could get over it and that is exactly what I did. I had to give Maddie her first time out this week. That wasn’t easy, but it was affective.

My husband wants me to go to work with him today. He’s an odd one. But I might just go. I’m applying for an internship today at a IT place for medical offices in the Austin area. It’s VERY close to home, actually it’s a block from my sister’s office, lol. Anyway, I am very excited about it and really hope they consider me. I would love the opportunity to get some more work experience and the money, even for an internship is really good!

I am really excited about tomorrow. We’re taking Maddie to the zoo for her birthday present. Us and Danielle and Beckham are headed to the San Antonio Zoo for the day and I am so excited! I LOVE ZOO’S! I haven’t been to that one since I was 8 and Kenzie hasn’t been to a zoo since she was 4! The only issue we may have is how early we’re leaving. We’re planning on heading out around 8:30ish and poor Danielle and Beckham usually don’t get up until noon (ahhhh to have one toddler again). Other then that it is going to be one fun day!

Oh and wondering about the title? Blame Backyardagains.

much needed update

This has been a long time coming. I’ve needed to update for a while but keep losing my train of thought.

The weekend after my last post my family loaded up and went to Houston for my family Christmas. We were the first ones there so we got to spend at least an extra hour and a half with my grandparents, which was nice. Then I saw all my cousins, aunts and uncles. Everyone was in attendance except for my parents. Everyone was also late which pissed my grandmother off to the highest degree. Once they all got there we left and went to the restaurant. The drinks were good, the conversation was not bad and the food was great! Maddie was pretty fussy half way into the meal so I had to take her outside. She also had an infatuation with my cousin Shari’s husband, Ryan. She kept pointing and saying, ‘him, him!’ She also was attached to Alyssa (my niece) by the hip! She calls her Lyssa, lol. Anyhoo- we went back to the house and the kids played their little game of white elephant and it went pretty well. Then the  kids got to open presents.

Mackenzie got a Orka Whale Webkin that she named Shammie, A preteen girls bible, Tinkerbell coloring books, ‘Here I am to worship’ kids  songs CD (which she loves and won’t stop listening to) and Ariel’s Beginning DVD. Oh and for the white elephant game, she got a wooden bead jewelry making set. She was in hog heaven!

Maddie got a purse, hair clips, a wooden block train (omg she adores that thing!), a play vacuum also played with on an hourly basis and some pajamas.

The adults played white elephant and everyone was pretty nice until our turn came up and we were snatched from and snatched back, it got dramatic, but fun! We ended up with the two gifts we came with ($25 worth of lotto scratch off’s and a Back and Decker Dust Buster wet & dry). I was very pleased! Then we headed home, and the girls did great on the drive home, thank God! Maddie fell asleep 10 minutes into the trip.

While Kenzie was off of school we finished our shopping up and spent a lot of time with family and with Danielle. We made dough ornaments for family and friends and that was a lot of fun! She also helped me a lot in the kitchen. I taught her how to  use the stove properly and she was able to make Macaroni and Cheese and even made the wing sauce for Christmas eve. She did awesome! Maddie loved having her sister home!

On Christmas Eve we spent the evening at our church. It was Howard’s oldest brother’s birthday and he drove up and came to church with us! It was so nice to see him and we had an amazing time at church. It was so beautiful and the songs were so much fun. Then we had communion which we needed. I don’t think I’ve enjoyed a service more then I did that night. We we came home, Karl came with us and Howard’s family and us ate wings that I had made before we left.

Then it was Santa time…That was fun. We hadn’t put out any presents before Christmas in fear of Maddie getting into them and we really wanted that ‘WOW’ factor on the sight of all the presents on Christmas morning. So it took us over an hour to get all the presents out and stockings done. It was very fun though!

Christmas morning went smoothly. Maddie and Kenzie were in awe of the presents and very happy with what they got. We had both sets of grandparents there on Christmas morning, which was a big change from the norm.

The day after Christmas we went to my sister’s to have our Christmas with them. They went all out with dinner this year and my brother in law made the famous ‘rack’ by Outback Steakhouse with the Cabernet sauce, salad,  shrimp cocktail, roasted potatoes (I brought those), rolls (I brought those too) and steamed broccoli. It was absolutely hands down one of the BEST meals I have ever had! I have only had one experience with lamb and It wasn’t my favorite but this was plain amazing!

We got my sister and Rex this big candle set and some large jarred candles in their favorite scent. My sis got me this perfume set by Liz Claiborne and Howard got a grilling apron and pot holders with the Aggie logo on it. We were thrilled! Mackenzie got a Yorkie webkin (she already had the exact one, but that’s ok now she has twins) and a bunch of webkin paraphernalia. Maddie got an awesome outfit from Osh Kosh with shoes. It’s precious! We got Alyssa a horse game for her Nintendo DS and some paint by numbers with horses on them. We got Austin two bioncle lego sets.

After the holidays we were in a lull of nothingness and it was wonderful! We all needed  break! We did have a game night and dinner with my BFF and her family and that was a lot of fun! We’re planning on doing something similar this weekend as well!

New Years came around and we were excited at the prospect of actually having plans on New Years! We were planning on going to a party and having the night kid free. Didn’t work out that way. Both of our kids weren’t feeling well and neither was I. By noon on New Years day Kenzie and I were full on with the stomach flu. Howard called my mom in for reinforcements. By 6pm he had it too. Maddie got it during the night.  It was the worst stomach flu I had ever had. We were all so miserable. After 35 hours we were all able to keep stuff down. I woke up Saturday morning and my husband was on a cleaning frenzy! We got the house disinfected and spotless by Sunday morning.

And now we’re back in the daily routine with school for Kenzie and for us. It’s nice to be back in our routine! Maddie will be two tomorrow and I can hardly believe it. I’m totally baffled at how fast 2008 went!

In Rememberance

I just watched the most precious 29 minutes and 57 seconds I have ever seen. I haven’t watched that tape since before Morgan passed. I’ve needed to watch it as an affirmation of life. To see with my own eyes and remember that at one point my baby was thriving, living inside me. I watched her move, dance, yawn, hiccup, kick her sister in the head, suck her thumb and interact with her sister in a way I will never see again in this life. That was such a beautiful thing to watch. But the thing that meant most to me was the 48 seconds of strong, beautiful heartbeat.
Kenzie asked me this morning on the way to school when Morgan died. I think she has a feeling that it was today. I told her that it was coming up, and coming soon. I didn’t want to spoil her Christmas party day. I normally never deter her from talking about Morgan but this morning I had to, for her.

I have been dwelling on my regrets surrounding Morgan’s death so much in the past few weeks. I know it’s unhealthy, but hard to do in these circumstances. I am just so thankful for Maddie, and that she’s healthy and safe. I’m so thankful that I had Morgan in my arms for those sweet moments.

Every Gift Comes From Above
We were blessed with twins, to cherish and love.
Born together to grow apart,
One in our hands and one in our heart.

If we could have a lifetime wish
A dream that would come true,
We’d pray to God with all our hearts
For yesterday and You.
A thousand words can’t bring you back
We know because we’ve tried…
Neither will a thousand tears
We know because we’ve cried…
You left behind our broken hearts
And happy memories too…
But we never wanted memories
We only wanted You.

The following was written in a card that the nurses gave us in the hospital after we had Morgan.
Gone but not forgotten
There is a little angel, with God up in the sky.
She sings a special song, Mommy and Madison please don’t cry.
Remember our tummy time and the joy I gave you.
Dear Mommy and Madison please don’t cry, I’m watching over you.

Morgan Kathleen
Received in Heaven on December 18th, 2006
Born on January 9th, 2007 at 3:05 PM

2 pounds and 15 3/4 inches long


This is going to be one long entry so go grab a cup of coffee first, and get me a grande Carmel macciato while you’re at it, k?

First of all I totally didn’t follow through with NaBloPoMo which makes me so mad at myself. It’s not like I didn’t have a ton to talk about, I did, I just got busy lol.

Kenzie’s great! Had a good week off for Thanksgiving played with her cousins and friends twice and really had fun spending time with her sister and daddy. Her grades are doing very well, I am so proud of her!

Maddie’s awesome too. She loved Thanksgiving, because she is a turkey, lol. She has been uncharacteristically sweet to relatives she doesn’t seen often which resulted in a lot of ‘awwww’s’. She is fascinated by the lights outside that Howard spent 4 days putting up and the Christmas decor on the interior of the house. She calls the lights ‘Pretties’. So, whenever she sees them on she screams, ‘PRETTIES ON!!!!!!!!!!!’ It’s precious! She got her first kiss on Friday, by a cousin but on the lips none the less, poor Derek, not a chance buddy.

My mom is slowly crawling back on her rocker. She’s gone back to the doctor and got back on her meds, YAY! Her diabetes is out of control which her doctor is pretty convinced that it may of caused a mini stroke a week ago. She has been sick for days now, all her medicine is going to take a while to kick in and work correctly again.

Howard’s doing good. He was having trouble with a professor of his recently and basically he called her out on being too critical and now she’s being better about it. His other class he’s doing amazing in! Job is going well, he loves it and the people he works with! Todd has been staying with us and going to work with him everyday so he’s not stuck in the house with me all day, which he doesn’t mind but he’d rather spend time with his brother, I don’t blame him at all! He has had a lot of fun Griswolding our house. It looks just beautiful! (yes, I’ll post pics soon!)

Now for me, I suppose. My learning team issues are not solved in any way. But the dreaded paper is almost done and will be finalized when I get the girls other part of the paper, she has sent me approximitely 300 useable words. She was supposed to give me around 1200! I’m upto 1800 so far. Just waiting. Hopefully she doesn’t take too much longer because it has to be posted before class on Thursday night. Speaking of Thursday, it’s my LAST CLASS!!!!! YAY!!!

Play by Play of other events:

Our Thanksgiving was great, food was awesome, my in laws and parents were here.
I got up at 4am and did Black Friday shopping and got soaked but tons of good deals, Howard slept in, butthead lol.
Friday’s Thanksgiving with my family was great. Kids had a blast and I really enjoyed spending time with my family. Howard was his normal, charming self lol.
Saturday we didn’t do anything except clean the house, relax, put up Christmas stuff and work on my papers.
Sunday we went to Church, went shopping and then went to my niece’s surprise birthday party. They’re going to Disney World for her real birthday and she was sad that she wasn’t going to have a birthday party with her friends and family so my sister threw her a surprise party.

Since then I’ve just been trying to finish these papers. I got my individual one done and turned in on Saturday.

So, that’s what’s been up with me. Now I need to get Maddie ready and go get Kenzie from school and take the girls to get their flu shots. Man are they going to be mad at me!


I am starting to get a little anxious about all my work due in the next few weeks. I just feel like I have a lot on my plate right now. Which I kinda do. The holidays, my kids, school, work, Howard, his parents issues and oh so much more. It’s just getting a little overwhelming.

As for work, I haven’t worked in the office in a few weeks. My entire staff of coworkers was let go and since technically I wasn’t hired on with the company they just basically haven’t called me in. I submitted my resume to Howard’s boss. They’re hiring tech support and a CSR and I’m their #1 canadiate. Go me! It’s a great company that is treating my husband very well. Also, it’s a small company growing company. I’d love to be able to help it grow. So, I’m very excited about that.

Ok, this took me forever. Maddie is pissed and yes, still awake. Howard’s passed out on the couch and I’m supposed to be working on my essay. But when I typed in, “kill me now” I decided I did enough for one night.


Last night was uneventful (thank you Kimm). Kenzie slept well, as did the rest of our household. She woke up this morning with a low grade fever and a sore stomach but was able to eat meals all day without getting sick. She is feeling a lot better but because of the fever, I’m concerned about school tomorrow, so we’ll see.

This morning was our new members class at our church. We are official members now. Church was a big turning point for me today. Basically I friggin l9pm lost it. The choir started singing amazing grace and my face started raining. I prayed with quite a few individuals from church today and it made me feel so good. Christianity is still hard to talk about for me. I believe in God, but there was a time when I didn’t. I can’t explain why I had this turning point and I why I feel such a pull to God, but I do. And it helps me get through my issues and that’s all that matters to me.

When we left church Howard and I went out to lunch and then he took me to best buy to buy me a laptop, I’m typing this entry from my bed. Not only that but at 9pm he left the house to take the trash to the dumpster and went to wing stop and grabbed us a late dinner and went to Wal-Mart and got me some Tylenol (my arthritis is killing me and we were all out).

Kenzie was feeling a lot stronger this evening so we’ll see about school. I told her if she didn’t have fever then she got to choose if she was going to school or not.

Anyway, I need to thank my husband properly, take that as you will and goodnight. 🙂


We ended up going to Caldwell today and man am I glad I’m home. Trip was good, kids were great until about 3pm. Kenzie had a TON of sugar (Mother in law, grandparents) and got a horrible stomach ache. She passed out shortly after, so did Maddie. When they woke up they were both unhappy and we left. We made it about…oh a mile and a half and Kenzie starting throwing her guts up ALL OVER THE VAN! Which proceeded to get all over the left side of the van, driver side and all. Scared Madison to death. It was a mess.

Maddie cried all the way home. She’s in bed now.

Kenzie didn’t throw up again, but her stomach hurts. She’s in bed now as well.

Let me clarify, we let our kids have sugar. But not much. She is not used to having sugar. Maybe a sucker every now and then and some juice. For the most part she drinks crystal light and eats sugar free Popsicles. Obviously it took a toll on her having orange soda, push pop Popsicle x2, sweet tea, koolaide, sonic ice cream shake and a cherry limeade from sonic. Geez. That makes me nauseas reading that!

Anyway, when we got home, I jumped out of the van and screamed ‘LAND!!!!!’ Which caused a laughing riot from the whole car.

I’m now going to bed because we’re supposed to be joining our church tomorrow at 9am.

Like pulling teeth from a grizzly!

The past 24 hours I have been trying to get a hold of my team so we could to the team charter. Now, for those who don’t know, the Team Charter is just a contract saying the people in our group, their strengths, their weaknesses and their contact information and general first ideas on our subject for the final project.

THIS has been a struggle, which it shouldn’t be. I guess I should of started calling on Monday. Ugh. Anyway, I have received 3 completed Team Charters, one is supposedly on it’s way and the other will not return my phone calls or emails. Lovely. I am fully prepared to post the team charter without that individual’s information but because he’s the one who chose the subject and knows most about it, I’m highly annoyed with him.

Today is a big day for me. Not only do I have class, but Maddie has her 6 month re-eval for PT today. I’m so nervous. I’m afraid she’s going to have to keep going, I’m afraid that she’s going to have to stop lol. Yes, I know I just contradicted myself. I’ve just received so much help from these people and I’m a little anxious about letting them go. Truth be told, it’s time. She’s ready, she’s up to par.

We had Parent Teacher Conferences yesterday. That went very well. Kenzie’s making 2 high B’s and the rest A’s. She is showing so many dyslexic tendencies and her teacher agrees with me. What to do about them, I don’t know. All in all it went very well.

Last night, Howard and I logged onto our student websites and looked at our account histories. BOTH OF OUR LOANS/GRANTS HAVE HIT THE ACCOUNT! OMG OMG OMG! That is such a relief! Howard’s hit on Monday, and mine on Tuesday. They say that it takes 7-10 business days for the money to be disbursed to us. Finally we have an outlook on it! I cannot wait until they get here. According to the website, it looks like we’re getting more then we expected, but that website is so damn vague and confusing I never know. What I do know is it’s on the way. *sigh*